5 Love Languages – Part 4

Third Language - Reciving Gifts

Gifts are a symbol of love.  If Words of Affirmation is about being sensitive to other person’s emotions, giving gifts is about expressing those emotions. When you give gifts to someone,  you think of the other person, you show how much happiness of the person is important for you. I must say that it’s also about how well you understand what will make another person happy. 

There are people who are very good at it. They know how to make someone feel special. These kind of people are quite expressive about their feelings and even if they don’t have money, they know how to make small things in life an absolute treat. 

There are other kinds of people who are not good at giving gifts.  Sometimes because they are not very expressive and sometimes because of money. Remember, if giving gifts is a waste of money and you want to save it for future, then you are being self-centered as you are purchasing self-worth and emotional security for yourself.

If you are the other kind who find it difficult to express yourself, then just think how important the other person is for you, how important his happiness is for you.  A love if not expressed to the other person, one day will lose it’s the charm. Yes, it’s true that not everything has to be explicit, but every person has a longing that someone should make him feel special. Some could make his special moment in life truly memorable forever, whether it’s birthdays, anniversaries, festivals etc.

Giving gifts is an investment in your relationship and you are filling your spouse’s emotional love tank. There is no such thing as a bad gift or cheap gift. It’s all about the emotions the gift has been given, it’s about the thought, it’s about the happiness of giving gifts as much as receiving gifts. 

Every gift need not have to be tangible.  Sometimes your presence itself is a very precious gift. Especially in challenging times and some very special moments, your presence worth much more than the costliest gift someone can think of. 

Gifts need not be expensive nor must they be given weekly. Their worth has nothing to do with money and everything to do with love.

Personal Experience

A gift is an act to show that you are thankful to the person.  Your spouse may do a lot of things for you and your family. Gifts present an opportunity for you to be thankful and show that you are thinking about your spouse. 
 
While it feels good to be on the receiving end, there is a feeling of self-gratification when you are the one who is doing the giving.  The happiness you get when you are opening a gift is temporary, but giving provides a more self-fulling experience that lasts for a longer period of time.  
 
I make sure that I make every new year special, every birthday special. This language I have learned from my father. He was very good at it and I can never forget the happiness which my Mom used to have while giving gifts to my her. 
 
If you are someone who doesn’t get gifts from your spouse, then don’t stop yourself from giving him gifts.  Because giving gifts is as much pleasure as receiving gifts. And who knows someday your spouse will understand how important this love language is for you.  

This is 4th in the 7 part series of 5 Love Languages book summary.

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